Monday, November 29, 2010

Crying Inside

Am I less than myself if I am not the responsible one that everyone thinks I am? The one who reaches the goals against all odds. The girl who has it all together when things are falling apart around her? The fixer.....The doer....The giver. Why am I thought to be less than myself when I don't do what's expected? Who told you to put me on that pedestal? Did I ask you to think more of me than the next? Is it my fault that I have always come through even when the obstacles made it seem impossible?

Allow me the freedom to fall, do the unexpected, live and smile because I want to. Let me sleep in, let the laundry pile up, not care for just a little while. What? That's irresponsible? It's unlike me? Something must be wrong? Well yeah, you're right! While you building your expectations of me and telling how great I am, I was crying inside; wanting to be held......wanting someone else to care for a change. But that's not me, right?

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